


Tides Of Light Bring Us Home

by Katyakora



Series: CWAweek2018 [6]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mass Effect Fusion, Alternate Universe - Space, CWAweek2018, Multi, biotic!Barry, quarian!Iris, turian!Leonard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-05-25 10:53:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14975660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katyakora/pseuds/Katyakora
Summary: After losing her husband, fate brought Iris to the Rogue and into the life of it's captain, Lenod Snarrut. But when Iris is gravely injured, Lenod must seek the help of strangers, and finds himself confronted with his lover's past.





	Tides Of Light Bring Us Home

**Author's Note:**

> Coldwestallen week Day 7: Space
> 
> Is this very late? Yes. Does it matter? Good question. I haven't even posted day 6 yet, but I'm gonna because I love that story even if it won't stop growing.
> 
> If you are unfamiliar with Mass Effect, just know that quarians have bad immune systems forcing them to where protective body suits and look up what the various aliens mentioned look like. Maybe google biotics (basically space magic). Quarian swears and ship names translated in the endnotes.

"This is the TFV Rogue requesting immediate assistance! Our hull is damaged and we have a severely injured quarian onboard! Repeat, we have a quarian in need of immediate medical attention!”

 

Lenod set the distress signal to loop and hastily checked the ship’s systems. They showed no change from a few moments ago; a serious hull breach, one engine down and all emergency power diverted to the medbay. He flicked to navigation, relieved to see that they had indeed damaged the pirate's ship too much for them to bother pursuing. He made sure that they were aiming for the nearest inhabited celestial body and then got out of the pilot's seat, speaking into the comm in his helmet.

 

“How’re those repairs going, Mick?”

 

 _“Be a lot faster if Trouble was up and kicking,”_ the krogan snarled, “ _you try repairing a hull breach while maintaining a biotic field!”_

 

 _“_ Worry about holding our atmosphere in for now,” Lenod ordered, “I'm sending Lisa to you.”

 

“ _The hell you are,”_  Lisa's voice snapped, “ _Iris needs me.”_

 

“What we need is a ship that doesn't have a hole in the side!” Lenod barked, “I can take care of Iris,” he reached the medbay and spoke to his half-sister directly, “but I can't hold a biotic field. Go relieve Mick so that he can put a proper patch up!”

 

The young asari pouted inside her helmet, suited up like him in the event the hull breach wasn't contained. She dutifully passed him the medigel and antibiotics and ran off towards the engine room. Lenod’s mandibles clicked with worry as he took in the sight of Iris, her suit torn and soaked in blood. Right now, the medbay’s small stasis field was the only thing keeping her alive, and that was draining the rest of their systems. If no one came to help soon, Lenod would have to choose between watching his lover die or he and the rest of his family suffocating when the air recyclers failed. He checked the medigel application, noting it was acceptably thorough, but there were already signs of infection. It wouldn't have been so bad if her already weak immune system wasn't recently compromised.

 

And he was the one who had compromised it. He should have known better than to give in to the connection between them, should have known that falling into a physical relationship was a bad idea. But Iris always seemed to have a way with getting him to bend his own rules.

 

*****

 

Lenod blinked down at the body curled up behind some crates.

 

“Why is there a quarian in my cargo bay?” he asked aloud.

 

The young quarian jumped, startled out of her doze by his pointed words. She instinctively went for the pistol at her hip, but Lenod kicked out a foot to press against the holster to keep it there. She froze, very aware of the threat his large talons were so close to her exosuit.

 

“Uh, uh, uh,” he tutted, “not a good idea.” Slowly, she released the handle of her gun and raised her hands. “That's better. Now, who are you and what the hell are you doing in my cargo bay?”

 

The quarian drew herself up, as much as was possible when sitting on the floor with a foot holding her down.

 

“My name is Iris’West vas Cecepyen,” she told him proudly. “And I _thought_ this ship had been locked down by the dock authority. Didn't think anyone would notice or mind me taking a nap while it wasn't in use.”

 

“You often sleep on strange ships?” he asked dubiously. She shrugged, uninsulted.

 

“It's the only place I can sleep when I’m planetside. Hotels are too quiet.”

 

Lenod stared down at her, his mandibles twitching in bemusement, but for a quarian, her story was actually plausible. They spent so much of their lives on ships that even the hubbub of a city might sound unsettling without the ever-present hum of an engine beneath it.

 

“Well, in that case I have bad news for you. The dock master 'misplaced’ his omnitool and we are now very much no longer docked.”

 

“What?!” the quarian shrieked.

 

“You slept through the relay jump. We’re almost to Omega.”

 

“OMEGA?!”

 

He took pity on her and lifted his foot, allowing her to scramble up and over to the cargo bay’s lone window. It was pointless, since all she could see was the void of space, but it was also very clear that they were no longer docked on a respectable counsel planet.

 

“No, no, no,” she muttered, the distortion of her helmet turning it into a single droning sound. “I can't go to Omega!”

 

“Stowaways can't be choosers,” Lenod pointed out archly. She turned her mask back to face him and despite not being able to make out her face, he could tell she was scowling at him.

 

“I didn't stow away.”

 

“No, technically you trespassed. I don't care. Either way, you’re still on my ship and breathing my oxygen.”

 

She sighed, clearly conceding to his logic.

 

“Look, can't you just take me back?”

 

“Even if I thought you could afford the fuel that would cost me, that's a hard no. The dock master isn't letting us touch down again any time soon.”

 

“Okay, look, just please don't dump me on Omega,” she pleaded.

 

“Oh, come on, Omega’s not so bad,” he drawled, “once you get the lay of the land, it's a world of opportunity.”

 

“For a turian, maybe,” she scoffed, “but a lone quarian? I’ll be lucky if I don't end up in indentured servitude.” She sighed. “Look, I know you don't owe me anything. But I'm willing to pay my way however you need until we get to a counsel planet.”

 

He cocked a brow ridge at her. “Thought you didn't want to end up an indentured servant?”

 

“I'm not signing any contracts,” she announced firmly, “just earning my fair share of food and oxygen.”

 

“Hmmm.” He assessed her for a long moment, seriously considering her offer. “You any good with engines? Computers?”

 

He could hear her eyes rolling. “I'm a _quarian_.”

 

“And I'm a turian who hates the military; never assume.”

 

“Obviously, but I'm willing to bet that you can still disassemble a rifle blindfolded.”

 

“Well, of course I know the _basics_.”

 

“Exactly. Our species just have different ideas about what constitutes 'the basics’. So? Do we have a deal or not?”

 

Lenod gave her a long look, before tapping his omnitool, opening up the comm link.

 

“It appears we have a stowaway,” he announced.

 

“ _Really?”_ Lisa scoffed, “ _somebody actually thought stowing away on a locked down ship was a good idea?”_

 

 _“You want me to come down and throw 'em out the airlock?”_ Mick grunted, sounding like he was barely paying attention.

 

“Actually, she's offered her services in exchange for passage. I'm putting it to a vote.”

 

“ _Interesting,”_ Lisa drawled, “ _exactly what kind of 'service’ is she offering?”_

 

Across from Lenod, Iris bristled.

 

“Not _that_ kind!” she snapped indignantly.

 

“ _Wait, that sounds like a quarian,”_ Mick interjected over Lisa's amused chuckle.

 

“I am a quarian.”

 

“ _Then what the hell are we still talking for?”_ Mick demanded. “ _Get your ass over here, I've been trying to fix the leak in the eezo backflush for a week, I could use the damn help.”_

 

“Well, you heard the krogan,” Lenod stated simply, closing the channel. “Follow the corridor then down to get to the engine room.”

 

“Krogan?” The quarian sounded surprised. To be fair, not a lot of krogan were willing to work with a turian, fewer still would work under them.

 

“Yes. That a problem?” Lenod asked pointedly.

 

“Not at all.”

 

“Good. Now, off you go.”

 

She complied, only to stop in the doorway. “Hey. You never told me your name.”

 

“It's Lenod. Lenodynus Snarrut. But to you, it's Captain.”

 

*****

 

“ _TFV Rogue, this is the SRV Starflash, do you copy? We have received your signal and are inbound. Repeat; TFV Rogue, this is the SRV Starflash, do you copy?”_

 

Lenod scrambled to open the comm channel on his omnitool.

 

“SRV Starflash, this is TFV Rogue, reading you loud and clear,” he answered, relief washing over him. “Be advised that we have a quarian in need of immediate medical attention and possible hostiles on our tail.”

 

“ _Our medbay is being prepped and our medical team is standing by to board. ETA 60 seconds._ ”

 

“Acknowledged.”

 

Lenod closed the channel and let out a gusty sigh, letting his head drop forward as the tight knot of tension and fear in his chest loosened. He willed Iris to hold on just a little longer, aching to be able to so much as hold her hand. He settled for letting his subharmonics hum in the way she found soothing, hoping it brought her comfort even in her unconscious state.

 

“ _Docking procedure complete,”_ his omnitool chirped, “ _please prepare patient for transport.”_

 

Taking a deep, calming breath to steady himself, Lenod stood and tapped at his omnitool, disengaging the stasis pod from its dock and manually pushing it towards the airlock to conserve the charge of its small battery. He was met at the airlock by a stern looking salarian with dark markings around his eyes, a dark-haired human and a very pale blue asari. The asari immediately got to work, using her own biotics to strengthen the stasis field while scanning Iris's injuries.

 

“Are there any other injured among the crew?” the salarian asked briskly.

 

“No, Iris was alone in the room when the secondary engine blew,” Lenod answered. He addressed the asari. “We’ve given her antibiotics, but they're mostly general use, nothing targeted. She also takes immuno-boosters regularly.”

 

She nodded. “She's stable, the biggest risk right now is infection. We need to get her to the clean room so I can properly treat her injuries.”

 

She didn't ask for permission, just began pushing the pod back through the docking tube. Lenod made to follow, but was stopped by the salarian.

 

“Are you the captain?”

 

“Yes,” he snapped tersely, despising the necessity of this conversation, “Captain Lenodynus Snarrut. This is my ship.”

 

“Commander Hari Wels,” the salarian responded in kind. “This is Cisco Ramon, our chief engineer. Please escort him to the areas in need of immediate repair so he can make a preliminary assessment.”

 

“I’ll take him,” Mick announced from where he had appeared behind Lenod. “I'll keep an eye on repairs,” he told Lenod, shoving his captain's shoulder forward. “You go with Trouble.”

 

Lenod nodded to him and didn't wait to see if either of their rescue party protested, he just marched after the asari. He caught up with her at the airlock to the other ship. If she was surprised by his presence, she didn't comment. They waited impatiently in the airlock for the decontamination protocols to complete.

 

“We have a state-of-the-art medical facility,” the doctor said, clearly attempting to be reassuring, “your crewman should make a fast recovery provided we can remove all the shrapnel and ward off infection. What's her name?” she asked briskly, her eyes never leaving the display of Iris's vitals. “We have a quarian onboard on pilgrimage; he should be able to access their medical records in case there is anything we need to know.”

 

“Iris’West vas Rogue nar Central.”

 

The asari’s head snapped up.

 

“Iris'West nar Central?” she repeated in shock.

 

Before he could answer, the doors opened and a team of people awaited them, ready to help.

 

“Get her to medbay,” the doctor ordered crisply, a salarian and an asari quickly taking over pushing the pod. “And Jax, where’s Wally?”

 

“Prepping the clean room with Barry, why?” A young drell responded.

 

“Because we just found his sister.”

 

*****

 

“So, exile or envoy?” Mick grunted over dinner one evening.

 

Their trip to Omega had been successful, their stowaway staying onboard the whole time, repairing all the little things that Mick hadn't gotten around to. Mick liked having the helping hand, especially one who didn't take any shit, and as a result Lenod was reluctant to let her go any time soon. It was hard to find crew who could gel with his little family, but Mick didn't hate her, and she and Lisa were already as thick as thieves as far as he could tell.

 

“Excuse me?” Iris asked. Lenod and Lisa slowed their eating, watching this play out intently.

 

“Quarian’s don't leave the fleet without a reason. You ain't on pilgrimage, so you either got kicked out or you're on a job for the fleet. Which is it?”

 

Iris propped her chin on her hands, her elbows resting on the tiny mess-hall table.

 

“I chose to leave.”

 

“Envoy, then,” Mick clarified. “What's your job?”

 

“Why are you so sure I still work for the fleet?”

 

“Quarians won't throw away a resource if they can help it. With space so cramped, they'd happily send you on your way with a legitimate job to do.”

 

She tilted her head in acquiescence to his logic. “I left because I married an alien,” she stated.

 

“Good for you. So what's you job? Keeping in mind that if you keep dodging the question, I'm just gonna assume your job is 'spy’.”

 

“I'm not a spy,” she denied, but sighed, conceding the verbal duel. “If you must know, it's my job to collate and verify current events stories. I send the data packets back to the fleet so that they can stay up to date on news from the rest of the galaxy without bias.”

 

“So, you're a reporter?” Lenod cut in, glad that his blunt partner had asked the question that he'd been planning to approach himself.

 

“Basically.”

 

“Where’s your husband, then?” Lisa asked curiously. “He doesn't take naps on strange ships with you?”

 

“He's dead.”

 

No one stopped Iris from leaving the table abruptly. Lenod sought her out later, finding her curled up on some crates in the cargo bay, watching the stars pass by out the window. He leaned against a tall stack of crates, joining her in gazing out the window.

 

“How long has it been?” he asked quietly, keeping his voice low so as not to startle her.

 

“Almost a standard year,” she responded dully. “His ship was attacked, completely destroyed. They found most of the pieces scattered in orbit over Noveria. No survivors.” She finally looked away from the window, and he got the distinct impression she was glaring at him. “Is this the part where you tell me you're sorry for my loss and start treating me like a fragile child?” she asked sarcastically.

 

He huffed. “Lucky for you, compassion ain't exactly my thing.”

 

“Pretty sure the fact that I'm not on Omega right now is a testament to that lie.”

 

“Are you kidding? I'd have to pay through the teeth for the kind of improvements you’ve made and all I have to do is house you; letting you stay was not an act of compassion, believe me.” He sighed, half sitting on the crate so he could face her. “You went home after, didn't you?” he probed.

 

She nodded. “It was good, at first. Good to be back with my family.”

 

“But then you got sick of everyone treating like you were broken.”

 

“Yep,” she answered tiredly. “And then my little brother was preparing for his pilgrimage and my dad started talking about how he couldn't wait for a grandbaby. He always acted like he was talking about Wally, but I couldn't help but feel like…”

 

“Like he expected you to settle down with a nice, stable quarian now that your alien was out of the picture?”

 

“Yeah,” she agreed, her voice taut with repressed anger, “like he was just some kind of phase that I needed to get out of my system.” She tilted her head at him, her composure suddenly thoughtful. “You know, for someone who doesn't 'do’ compassion, you're a pretty good listener.”

 

“Well, I'm raising an asari, so I didn't really get much choice in the matter,” he played it off with a shrug.

 

“I get that. It's tough being an older sibling. Especially when there's not a lot of people around who understand what it's like.”

 

“Thats right, I didn't think quarians were allowed to have more than one child?”

 

“There was a population slump a few years after I was born,” Iris explained with a shrug. “They give out special breeding permits when that happens.”

 

“Sounds romantic,” he deadpanned, pleased to hear her chuckle in response.

 

“You joke, but in quarian culture, winning a second breeding permit is basically a second wedding.”

 

“I stand corrected.” He let his gaze drift back to the window. “After our next pick-up, we’re headed to Illium. It's on the very edge of Counsel Space, but you could book passage to just about anywhere you wanted from there.” He hesitated.

 

“Guess it's time to say goodbye to my crazy, glamorous adventure as a stowaway,” she quipped, but it felt flat.

 

“You could,” he agreed, “or you could do something just as crazy and glamorous. Say, joining a crew of smugglers?”

 

Her head snapped up and he imagined wide, surprised eyes beneath the veil of her visor.

 

“Really?”

 

“Not a lot of people can handle the heat of sharing the engine room with Mick,” he stated casually, “and Lisa likes you. They'd never forgive me if I didn't ask.” He neglected to mention that he himself had yet to tire of her company, which was a glowing commendation in its own right. “Your job basically boils down to 'wander the galaxy, send news’. This ship’ll take you to all corners of the galaxy, with the bonus of making credits as you go. Assuming the whole 'smuggler’ part isn't a deal breaker.”

 

She was silent for a long moment, studying him behind her visor.

 

“And here I was putting so much effort into pretending I had no idea you were smugglers.”

 

“Discretion being one of your selling points.”

 

“This had better not be an elaborate set-up just to get me to sign a contract,” she teased, and Lenod couldn't suppress the pleased flick of his mandibles.

 

“There will be no servitude, I swear.”

 

After another moment’s deliberation, she held out a hand. “Looks like you’ve got yourself a new crew member.”

 

*****

 

Lenod wasn't permitted in the medbay cleanroom, for obvious reasons. Thankfully the room had an observation window and no one dared to stop him standing vigil as the pale asari, Dr S’Now, prepped Iris for surgery. Luckily, the rest of the beds in the medbay were unoccupied, so there was no worry of disturbing any patients and their arrival at the cleanroom had caused enough of a stir. Both the quarian and the suited up human were visibly shocked and shaken by the sight of Iris, and Lenod would bet his ship that the young quarian was Iris's little brother. The human’s equally strong reaction was a mystery, his big green eyes filling with tears. But Lenod was not particularly inclined to dwell on it at the moment. He was far too busy trying to will Iris to survive.

 

Watching Iris’s suit be removed by someone other than himself might have felt wrong if it weren't for the obvious necessity of it and the presence of one of her family. Once the prep was complete, Wally was ushered from the room, likely no longer needed and making room for one of the salarians who had suited up to assist. Wally joined Lenod in his vigil, pacing in a show of nerves, and occasionally hesitantly glancing in his direction. After a while he spoke, his curiosity likely a welcome distraction from his sister's predicament.

 

“You’re her captain, right? Captain Snarrut?”

 

“Among other things. And Lenod is fine, Wallis.” Lenod didn't take his eyes off the window.

 

“She told you about me?”

 

“Why wouldn't she?” Lenod cocked a brow ridge at him. The young quarian seemed to be studying him with intrigue.

 

“You must be a good captain.”

 

“I try?” Lenod responded, unintentionally lilting it into a question.

 

“Iris doesn't get along with a lot of captains,” Wally explained, “so if she's stayed this long, she's probably not constantly arguing with you.”

 

“I wouldn't go that far,” Lenod said with a snort. When their personalities did clash, it was far from a quiet debate.

 

“Well, you haven't kicked her off yet,” Wally said with a shrug, “makes you a good captain in my book.”

 

“Thanks, kid,” Lenod muttered, privately proud of himself for not screwing up his first meeting with one of Iris's family. The surgery had properly begun and Lenod rested a hand over his face to contain the worried twitching of his mandibles.

 

“Hey, is that-?”

 

Lenod avoided Wally's curious hand with a side-step and a glare.

 

“It's a _gift_ ,” he snapped. He was rather attached to the bracers Iris had made him, and he’d had a few people make cracks about him wearing something so blatantly quarian.

 

“Yeah, but that fabric, it's from Iris's suit,” Wally stated pointedly.

 

“She made them with some excess after she last patched her suit. What of it?”

 

Wally's helmeted head swung back and forth between Lenod and the view through the window.

 

“Um, did she explain the, uh, significance?” He sounded nervous and surprised.

 

“She said it was for luck,” Lenod drawled suspiciously, beginning to suspect there was something he was missing.

 

“It is, but it's also, well, it's a quarian thing,” he stammered.

 

“I got that. So what's it mean?”

 

“...I think maybe Iris should tell you.”

 

“No, I think I'd like to know right now,” Lenod countered icily, letting his subharmonics rumble an intimidating undertone.

 

“It's… well, people usually exchange a piece of their suit when they’ve, y’know...linked suit environments?” Wally finally stammered, sinking into his shoulders with embarrassment. “To be, um, * _ahem*_ intimate?”

 

“Oh,” was all Lenod could say to the knowledge that Iris had apparently been happy to announce to every quarian they met that she was sleeping with him.

 

“Yeah,” Wally agreed with a nervous laugh, “this is going to be so awkward.”

 

“Right now, I couldn't care less,” Lenod stated honestly. He had far more pressing things to worry about than Iris's family's hang-ups.

 

Thankfully, Wally seemed to agree, because they watched the rest of the procedure in silence, Wally fidgeting the entire time. After a while, Lisa joined them, quietly whispering to Lenod that a preliminary patch was in place and Mick was conferring with the other engineers over a more long term repair. After what felt like forever but was in fact just a few hours, the human left the medbay, leaving the others to finish up.

 

“You’re the captain?” he asked as soon as he was free of his cleansuit. At Lenod's nod, he marched over, and just as Lenod was braced for some kind of hostility, the human wrapped his arms around him, pulling the startled turian into a heartfelt hug.

 

“Thank you,” he practically sobbed into Lenod's ear. “Caitlin said you got her into stasis just in time. She's going to be okay.”

 

“That's great news, but I didn't exactly do it for you,” Lenod drawled, carefully extricating himself from the huggy human, who just chuckled as he stepped back.

 

“I know,” he said with a bright, relieved smile that could light up the black of space. “I just don't think I could have handled coming back only to lose her.”

 

Lenod frowned at him. “You know Iris?”

 

“Awkward…” Wally muttered behind him, making Lenod even more confused.

 

Before he could respond to Lenod's question, Dr S’Now left the medbay to give Lenod a more formal summary of Iris's condition.

 

“She's out of the woods for now,” she announced. “We were able to find and remove all the shrapnel, and what looks like a very recent round of immuno-boosters means she started fighting infection before it could get a foothold. Does she take them often?”

 

“Yes, she takes them most nights, usually after dinner.”

 

“Ooh, every night, really?” Lisa teased in a suggestive purr. Lenod glared at her, ignoring the choking noise Wally made.

 

“Not _every_ night,” he corrected, and then directed the relevant information at Dr S’Now, “probably every second or third night.”

 

“Did not need to know that,” Wally lamented quietly, earning a confused look from the human.

 

“Really?” the doctor mused, tapping away at her omnitool, “that's an unusually regu...oh. Oh!” The doctor cast a slightly alarmed glance between Lenod and her huggy human assistant. “I see. Well, if she's on a regular course, I'm assuming supplemented with antibiotics, then it would be best to maintain that while she recovers. We’ll be monitoring her closely for the next day or two, but barring severe infection, she should recover from her wounds quickly. Are you familiar with cleanroom protocols?”

 

“Ha, his quarters are basically a cleanroom.”

 

They all turned to see Mick striding down the corridor, the scarred and wicked looking krogan seeming starkly out of place in the pristine halls of the research vessel. He looked Lenod up and down as he approached the group.

 

“You look less like shit, so I'm assuming Trouble’s alive?”

 

“Alive and fighting,” Lisa confirmed proudly.

 

“'Course she is. Tell her when she wakes up that I saved her some ryncol.”

 

“She should not, under any circumstances, be drinking _ryncol!_ ” the doctor exclaimed in horror.

 

“You don't have any ryncol,” Lenod pointed out at the same time.

 

“Nah, but I saw a krogan on the command deck. Bet he's got some.” And with that he left, nominally in search of said krogan and his hypothetical ryncol.

 

“Nate doesn't have any ryncol,” the human assured the doctor quietly. She pursued her lips and addressed Lenod.

 

“He won't be a problem, will he?”

 

“Only if he finds some ryncol. Now, what were you saying about cleanroom protocols?”

 

“Oh, yes. We have her in a specially contained medical pod, but if you want to see her, you’ll still need to follow cleanroom protocols.”

 

“You got a cleansuit in my size?”

 

“We have several turians on board, we should have something that will fit. I'll have a look.”

 

She walked away, leaving Lenod and Lisa with Wally and the human, who fixed those big green eyes back on Lenod.

 

“Seriously, thank you,” he said sincerely. “It's such a relief to know that Iris has had good people watching her back out there.”

 

“'Good is a stretch,” Lenod drawled, “but we take care of our own.”

 

“Regardless, I appreciate it.” The human looked back through the window wistfully at Iris’s unconscious form. “It’s been hell not being able to contact her.”

 

“Nothing stopping you,” Lenod pointed out with a frown.

 

“You mean aside from the fact that she’d been on a constantly moving ship with shifting registration and an encrypted extranet connection?” the human asked archly.

 

“Fair,” Lenod conceded, “but she still calls home every now and then. Pretty sure a message could have been passed along.”

 

The human sighed sadly. “I’m not exactly Jo’s favorite person these days. I think he actually thought he was protecting her by not telling her that I’m alive.”

 

Lenod side-eyed him, unable to shake the feeling that there was something he was missing yet again.

 

“You never mentioned how you know Iris,” he drawled pointedly, “or who you are, for that matter?”

 

“Oh,” the man blushed, embarrassed, “I’m sorry, it completely slipped my mind. I’m Ba-”

 

“Boss!” Mick called, reappearing, thankfully sans alcohol. “We gotta talk.” He eyed the human as he walked up to Lenod, purposefully placing his body between the pair.

 

“What is it?” Lenod asked lowly, Mick’s unexpected behaviour putting him on edge. Perhaps their fortuitous benefactors couldn’t be trusted after all.

 

“Got talking to the pretty krogan,” Mick whispered back, “an’ he started talking about some of the folks on board. He mentioned a human they picked up who just came out of a coma. Claims his name is Barry Allen.”

 

Lenod felt his heart freeze at his words. He gave Mick a tiny, tense nod and tapped his shoulder, prompting the krogan step to aside. He appreciated the gesture, really, and it was in fact nice to have a chance to brace himself. But he needed to hear it first hand. He needed to be certain.

 

“I’m sorry, what were you saying?” he enquired politely, very aware of the tension in every fibre of his being and how his previously open drawl had shrivelled up into a cold snap.

 

“Oh, uh, just that I’m Barry,” the human answered, staring up into Lenod’s eyes with mild confusion. “Barry Allen.”

 

“Barry Allen’s dead,” Mick growled warningly from Lenod’s shoulder.

 

“Barry’s been in a coma for almost two years; he only woke up a couple of months ago,” Wally explained, stepping up to Barry’s defence. “The shape they found him in, it’s a miracle he survived at all. Until I arrived, they had no idea he had any living family to inform of his survival.”

 

“I find that hard to believe,” Lenod stated icily.

 

“He’s an orphan and their marriage was on the Fleet records, not Counsel or Alliance records,” Wally argued stubbornly. “We’ve been trying to get a hold of Iris, but like Barry said, she’s hard to track and Dad refuses to tell her.”

 

“Because he knows it’ll break her heart,” Lisa interjected sagely, looking at her brother sadly. “Boys, I think we should leave these two to have an important conversation.” She didn’t give them the chance to argue, grabbing both quarian and krogan by the arm and leading them away. The door of the medbay shut resoundingly behind them, and Lenod was willing to bet that she’d also locked it. Now they were alone in the medbay.

 

“I’m confused. Why is everybody acting weird?” Barry asked, looking back and forth between Lenod and the door.

 

“Some people react strangely to awkward situations,” Lenod drawled cryptically. He leaned back against one of the beds and crossed his arms, avoiding looking directly at Barry. “After all, it’s not every day that the husband meets the boyfriend.”

 

“The...oh. Oh!”

 

“Yeah. Awkward.”

 

Lenod glanced up to see his reaction and a small part of him was pleased to see the shocked human looking him up and down and looking a touch intimidated. Barry blinked hard and scrubbed a hand down his face, as though that might reset his brain. His shoulders slumped and, to Lenod’s surprise, he moved to lean heavily on the cot next to him, a healthy foot of space separating them.

 

“I knew this would happen,” Barry lamented quietly, his human voice sounding flat to Lenod without subharmonics, but still with defeat clearly discernible in it. “I’ve been gone so long. I mean, I hoped that maybe she’d still be...which was stupid because she’s amazing and beautiful and of course she moved on.”

 

“Moved on? Are you kidding?” Lenod scoffed bitterly. “You’re the love of her life, that’s not something people just ‘move on’ from. Still has her bond symbol under her gloves.”

 

“Really? She still wears her ring?” Barry perked up, only to visibly chasten himself for his own insensitivity. “And you were, y’know, okay with that?”

 

“I was perfectly comfortable with it when I thought I was competing with a dead man.”

 

“Ah, right. Sorry about that.” He rubbed the back of his neck in a human gesture that Lenod wasn’t sure how to interpret.

 

“Did you seriously just apologise for not dying?”

 

“Maybe? I don't know, I just feel terrible about the whole situation.”

 

“Why? You’re the one getting your wife back,” Lenod pointed out bitterly. Barry turned those big green eyes on him.

 

“We don’t know that,” he argued, his expression settling into firm determination, putting a bright spark into those big eyes. “Not until Iris wakes up and decides what she wants.”

 

Lenod’s mandibles flared in surprise as he looked down at the human sharply. Barry’s shoulders were set, his spine straight, every inch of him daring Lenod to argue. It was, quite frankly, an attractive look, and for the first time Lenod understood just what Iris had seen in this human.

 

“A nice sentiment,” he mused after a long moment, “but I think we both know how this ends.”

 

“I’m not so sure,” Barry admitted. “Two years is a long time. Wally says that she changed after I...died. It’s only been a few weeks for me. What if...what if we’re too different now? I can’t expect everything to just go back to the way it was like nothing happened, especially if she’s seriously seeing someone else.”

 

Lenod wanted to deny that it was serious, some old instinct to defend against potential vulnerabilities flaring. But if he’d learned anything from this whole ordeal, it was that Iris was just as important to him as Lisa and Mick. The thought of potential losing her had been heart-breaking, and now he stood to lose her in a different way entirely. He knew that Iris cared for him a great deal, but it was Barry whom she had chosen to marry, had wanted to spend the rest of her life with. He might have hoped that she and him would reach that stage in time, but she and Barry were already there.

 

“Look, kid, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Iris loves you, finding temporary comfort with someone else isn’t gonna change that.”

 

Barry smiled wryly. “While I appreciate you trying to comfort me, it’s not really that simple. If there’s one thing I know about Iris,” he reached over and tapped pointedly on Lenod’s bracer, “it’s that Iris doesn’t really do casual. When she cares, she gives her whole heart. And I’ve seen enough today to know that she’s probably not the only one.”

 

Lenod scowled, but didn’t argue. Iris had gotten under his carapace and claimed a place in his heart a long time ago.

 

*****

 

“Y’know, I used to think that Barry was danger prone,” Iris said conversational as she applied medigel to the deep gouges on Lenod’s chest, “but you, sir, are _so much worse_!”

 

“I resent that,” Lenod said with a wince as she carefully treated his tender flesh, exposed when a piece of his carapace was torn away. “If it weren’t for Mick and Lisa, I would have a nice, safe, boring life, thank you very much.”

 

“Ha,” Iris mocked, “keep telling yourself that. It wasn’t Mick who used himself as live bait.”

 

“To keep the varren from chasing Lisa,” he pointed out dryly, “and to be fair, I wasn’t aware that there were quite so many.”

 

“That was an excessive number of guard-varren, that’s true,” Iris agreed, “but it was still your plan.”

 

“I had accounted for the varren.”

 

“Just not that many?”

 

“Exactly.”

 

Iris shook her head at him. “At least Mick managed to get you out of there.” She sighed. “Just, promise me you’ll account for excessive numbers of varren in the future?” She jabbed his uninjured side, but he still winced. “I’m getting real sick of patching up the men in my life.”

 

Her words gave Lenod pause. There was something heavy in there, a meaning deeper than the light hearted jab it was intended to be. It was typical of the dance they had begun to step around each other. Lenod had been intrigued by her at first, this woman with a will of iron and a tongue as sharp as his own. The closer they got, the more of her fire he saw, and the more intrigued he became. She, in turn, seemed to be drawn to him, the pair of them bouncing off each other naturally and making an effective team in the field. Their interactions seemed to carry a charge as of late, and no more so than now when Lenod sat shirtless in the medbay as she fussed over him. It seemed as good a time as any to see if the connection he’d been feeling was mutual.

 

He snagged her hand, forcing her to pause in her work and meet his eyes. She didn’t say anything when he laced their fingers together, just subconsciously leaned closer.

 

“I’ll plan for varren next time. I promise.”

 

The hand he held tightened around his.

 

“You’d better.” There was a shakiness to her voice that couldn’t be explained away as typical speaker distortion. “Scars are sexy; corpses are not.”

 

Lenod couldn’t stop the pleased click of his mandibles. “You think my scars are sexy?” he teased.

 

“Clearly I’ve been spending too much time around Mick,” Iris deflected.

 

“That’s not a no.”

 

“Wasn’t meant to be.” Her helmet gained a stubborn, challenging jut. “Apparently I have thing for stubborn aliens who don’t know how to stay out of trouble.”

 

Lenod blinked in shock, not having expected her blatant admittance to her attraction. She giggled at him.

 

“Careful, if you don’t close your mouth, your mandibles might fall off.” Her hand was still  in his, and he was abruptly reminded of this when she let her thumb run over his in a soothing gesture. He snapped his jaw and mandibles closed.

 

“Guess you’re not the only one with a thing for troublesome aliens,” he said finally, ignoring the traitorous thud in his chest as he waited for her response. The sound of an amused hum rattled from her helmet and she raised the hand she held to cradle it against her chest. He could feel the rapid pulse of her own heart beneath her ever-present suit.

 

“It’s good not to be alone.”

 

*****

 

Lenod wanted to hate Barry Allen, he really did. But Barry himself just made that impossible. He was everything that Iris had said he was; stubborn, optimistic, intelligent and selfless. He fluctuated seamlessly between adorably awkward and unwaveringly confident depending on the direction of the conversation. In the hours, and soon days, that they whiled away at Iris's bedside, the awkwardness of their situation fell away as both indulged their curiousity. Barry was eager to hear all about Iris and Lenod's adventures on the Rogue and Lenod got to learn more about Iris's life before the Rogue without feeling like he was ripping open a wound just by asking. Wally joined them for a while at first, but got antsy just sitting watching Iris breath, and went to distract himself helping with the Rogue's repairs.

 

Lisa would inevitably came along to cajole them into eating, her voice over the intercom easily suggesting violence if they even thought about putting it off again. Neither was thrilled to leave Iris's side, but after the first day, they knew better than to argue. Leaving the cleanroom had become routine, stopping in the small, cramped antechamber to remove their cleansuits. But one evening when Lenod had just removed the top half of his suit, he realised that Barry wasn’t moving, just staring at him with his own suit half off. Lenod bristled, assuming Barry was horrified by his scars. But they had gone through the ritual of getting in and out of their cleansuits many times at this point, and Barry had never reacted and had enough of his own for Lenod to assume it was a none-issue. It was strange that only now Barry was reacting, and then he noticed the way Barry was swaying slightly, his eyes unfocused and his expression dazed.

 

“Barry?”

 

Barry didn't respond. Concerned, Lenod reached out to nudge Barry's bare shoulder. Just as his rough palm made contact with warm, soft skin, Lenod saw the rich green of Barry's eyes become swallowed by blackness. The contact sent a spark through him and then Lenod felt his reality slip into darkness.

 

_Hope. Fear. Curiosity. Love. Guilt._

 

_Iris._

 

The emotions were both his and not his, enveloping him until it felt as though he was suspended within them. It should have been terrifying but instead it was like being cradled; warm and protected. Laughter echoed through the darkness, an amalgam of many voices, not all of which he recognised. The sound danced over his carapace, tingling every nerve until his whole body seemed to be filled with the joyous sound. His surroundings flowed into a memory, lying in a bed that did and did not belong to him, holding Iris close with arms that were and weren’t his. The memory shifted, and Lenod found himself looking at a warped version of himself. He knew for a fact that he wasn't that tall, nor were his eyes that large and piercing. The white colony marks on his slate grey carapace were too long and sharp. This caricature of him looked far stronger and more intimidating than Lenod had ever actually been, at least until it reached out to lay a gentle talon on the medpod in which Iris lay. Then, everything softened, and a warmth seeped into the edge of his senses.

 

It built within him as the moment stretched. He could feel himself on the precipice of something, about to fall when reality abruptly reasserted itself. Lenod blinked and found himself sitting sprawled on the floor next to Barry, the doors open and Lisa and Caitlin crouching over them looking concerned.

 

“What the fuck was that?” Lenod demanded, his subvocals a little more hoarse than usual.

 

“It looked like a damned mind-meld,” Lisa commented, glaring at Barry who looked stricken.

 

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to! I had no idea I could do that!”

 

“Guess we have another symptom for the chart,” Caitlin sighed as the asari helped the two stand. “Ever since his accident, Barry's biotics have been off the chart by human standards,” she explained to Lenod and Lisa, “He can do things that I've only ever seen matriarchs capable of, but they can also be erratic while he figures out how to control them. We didn't know he was capable of melding, though.”

 

“I thought only asari could meld,” Lenod pointed out, eyeing Barry. Barry's skin had turned a vibrant pink and he wasn't meeting anyone's eye.

 

“Until just now, I'd have said as much,” Caitlin confirmed, “but being exposed to eezo in space, coupled with the modifications we had to make to keep his broken implant from killing him, seems to have altered the way his body generates and reacts to mass effect fields. It's more natural, more, well, like an asari.”

 

“Oh!” Lisa exclaimed before giggling. “That is just adorable.”

 

“How exactly is any part of this situation adorable?” Lenod demanded archly.

 

“Because he's a human male who is basically going through asari puberty.”

 

Barry blanched and looked to Caitlin, who nodded with a wince.

 

“There are a lot of similarities, yes,” she admitted. “Accidental melds are uncommon, as most young asari practice with friends and loved ones, but it does happen to more isolated individuals. For someone who didn't know that they could do it at all, it was bound to happen eventually.”

 

“Oh,” Barry murmured, looking conflicted. “So it's random?”

 

“No. It's usually triggered by a subconscious desire for connection,” Caitlin answered briskly, before realising how her words might be a little embarrassing for Barry. “But not a physical connection, well, not necessarily, more of a mental connection.”

 

“I think they get it Doc,” Lisa said with a wry smirk.

 

“Yes, well, Barry if you stay here in the medbay a while I can talk with you about mind-melding basics and, * _ahem*_ etiquette.”

 

“I am really sorry,” Barry told Lenod, guilt clear on his face.

 

“You didn't know,” Lenod said with a shrug. In retrospect, Lenod should have realised what was happening himself from helping Lisa learn to meld.

 

“Still, that was kind of... invasive. I'm sorry.”

 

“Just ask next time,” Lenod brushed him off and made to leave, honestly just wanting to be done with the awkward situation.

 

He didn't think much of his words, not until there was a knock on the door to his quarters on the Rogue. On the other side he found a very sheepish looking Barry, biting his lip and ringing his hands. Lenod had always privately wondered how humans and asari managed to do anything without all those extra fingers getting in the way, yet suddenly found himself wondering how they’d feel against his carapace.

 

“Um, Mick let me on,” Barry responded to Lenod's confused frown, “told me to come here.”

 

“Of course he did,” Lenod muttered. “Well? What do you want?”

 

“I, well, Caitlin said that I should find someone to practice melding with, and I thought it might be less awkward trying it with someone I'd already done it with?”

 

Lenod blinked. Barry rubbed the back of his neck.

 

“I just, Caitlin said it was better to do it with someone experienced and Lisa said you helped her when she was learning and I couldn't think of anyone other than Iris I'd be comfortable doing this with and-”

 

“Fine, fine, I’ll do it, don't hurt yourself.”

 

“-I...you will?”

 

“Yeah, if only to save someone else from the rambling. Come in.”

 

Lenod stepped back to allow Barry to enter his quarters. Barry ducked inside, still looking very nervous. If he'd been a turian, Lenod imagined his mandibles would be a blur of nervous twitching. Lenod wondered briefly how Barry felt about all the evidence lying around that a quarian had been sharing these quarters.

 

“Thank you,” Barry said sincerely.

 

“I'm about to get another joyride through your thoughts and memories,” Lenod pointed out archly as he took a seat on the bed, “not sure why you're thanking me.”

 

“Still, I know I'm asking a lot and you don't owe me anything,” Barry said seriously, his face gaining a mulish look that he had learned from Iris. “So I appreciate you doing this for me.”

 

Lenod thought about the brief glimpse he'd had into Barry's memories. If it were reversed, Lenod wasn't sure he would be quite as eager to have someone in his head. But Barry was so utterly guileless and sincere that Lenod couldn't help but trust him. He patted the bed in front of him.

 

“Well if we're doing this, we might as well get started. Have a seat.”

 

Barry's cheeks flared that fetching shade of pink again as he gingerly sat cross-legged across from Lenod.

 

“I'm assuming Caitlin told you the basics?” Lenod asked.

 

Barry nodded, and held out a hand for Lenod to take. Lenod did, the feel of it so alien in his hand, all those extra fingers curling around his in a way that made his hand feel enveloped. His skin was soft and warm, like Iris's, but smoother. The touch reminded him of the intimacy of what they were about to do, and Lenod was surprised with himself at how easily he had agreed. Melding was not something asari engaged in lightly; just as most species didn't not share their innermost thoughts and fears with just anyone. Lenod had no doubt that there were people on the Starflash that Barry had grown close to, people far more suited to this task than Lenod, and yet Barry had chosen him. Perhaps that was why he had agreed. Or perhaps it was the chance to see deeper into Barry himself. Lenod could not deny that there was something about Barry that drew him in, made him want to learn more, to understand just why Iris loved him so fiercely.

 

That and the warm feeling that had enveloped him last time, something he couldn't define yet wanted to feel again.

 

“Are you ready?” Barry asked. Lenod nodded and in an instant of concentration, Barry's eyes went black.

 

Once more, Lenod's senses were overtaken by something beyond himself. He got that sense of being wrapped in emotions once more, but this time was much more aware.

 

_Anxiety. Hope. Fear. Curiosity. Love. Guilt._

 

_Iris._

 

_Barry._

 

Lenod couldn’t manipulate the meld, not like Barry could, but he could throw out ideas and hopefully direct him. Startlement rippled around him, but Lenod felt himself being pulled into a memory. The planet was unfamiliar, but it appeared to be a prosperous human colony. He found himself much shorter and following a human woman around, listening intently as she took samples from the earth and explained why she needed each one. When the woman smiled down at him, Lenod recognised her smile and her bright green eyes. This must be Barry’s mother. She took his hand and led him back towards some buildings. There, a human man sat idly reading datapads. He looked up at their return and smiled, opening his arms broadly for Lenod to leap into them. The man chuckled and asked what Barry had learned, smiling all the way through the exuberant recital. Something inside Lenod shattered as he realised that he had never had this. His father had never held him, had never let him chatter about his day, would have punished him simply for speaking out of turn.

 

The memory cracked and crumbled, leaving Lenod in a very familiar house and his father grabbing him by his fringe to throw Lenod against the wall as he snarled insults at his son’s slumped and bleeding form. Lenod couldn’t remember what he’d done to earn this particular punishment, but it didn’t matter. It was just one of many incidents where his father had taken his temper out on him. The memory disappeared and returned to the hazy in-between where only emotion existed. Warmth embraced him, a protective shell of compassion and sorrow encasing him. Lenod trembled within it, knowing that this comfort came from Barry. He’d seen into Lenod’s childhood, an inadvertent side-effect of Lenod’s reaction to a glimpse into Barry’s. He should want to pull away, to break the meld and put as much distance between them as possible. Barry had gotten to experience something that Lenod was barely comfortable talking about. And yet everything in the swell of emotion around him provided a comfort that Lenod hadn’t known he needed. He had always wondered why asari were so eager to share pieces of themselves with each other, but now he thought he understood. He didn’t feel like he was baring his scars, he felt like those scars were being filled in by Barry’s compassion and understanding. It was almost frightening how serene Lenod felt. When he’d done this in the past with Lisa, he had concentrated on her, on making her feel loved and appreciated despite losing her mother and their father’s abuse. Having someone do the same for him was unexpected and instead of pulling back, Lenod didn’t want to let go.

 

But inevitably, Barry ended the meld, looking at Lenod apprehensively through his lashes.

 

“I’m sorry, I...I don’t know how that happened, I didn’t mean to see…”

 

“It’s okay,” Lenod whispered, his subharmonics hissing out his rattled nerves. He shook himself, trying to regain some of the calm, cold demeanour that he wore like armour. “I reacted to your memory and you followed the response. Now you know what that feels like, you should be able to control it next time.”

 

“I will,” Barry swore vehemently, and then blinked. “...next time?”

 

“Clearly you need more practice,” Lenod drawled, making Barry blush and duck his head.

 

“It’s harder than I thought,” Barry admitted, “I just wanted to see and feel everything.”

 

“Lisa was the same, and her brain is actually designed to do this. Yours isn’t, there’s bound to be a few hiccups.”

 

Barry smiled at him, warm and genuine and Lenod felt like he was suspended in comfort again at the sight of it.

 

“I really appreciate you doing this for me. Especially after...that. You’re a good man, Lenodynus Snarrut. I can see why Iris loves you.”

 

Lenod couldn’t bring himself to deny Barry’s accusation.

 

“...likewise,” he responded after a long moment, because he really did understand how Iris had fallen for Barry. And he was starting to suspect that he understood a little too well.

 

“I should probably let you get some sleep,” Barry said, glancing at the clock by the bed. “If you don’t mind...same time tomorrow?”

 

“Sure.”

 

“Goodnight, Lenod.”

 

Lenod farewelled Barry with a nod. As soon as the door shut behind him, Lenod fell back onto his bed with a sigh. He was fairly certain that if Iris was awake right now, she would be laughing at him. Lisa certainly did the next time she saw him, refusing to explain why.

 

As per their usual routine, Lenod and Barry met in the medbay to spend the day sitting at Iris’s side. Any awkwardness that may have lingered from the previous day’s events was thoroughly quashed by Barry’s ability to talk endlessly about science, and it only took a few words from Lenod to get him firmly on a tangent. Lenod always enjoyed watching Barry get more and more animated as he talked about his passions. Caitlin came in around mid-morning to do her usual rounds and checks, and Lenod noted the way her eyes kept flicking up to the pair of them today, assessing.

 

“Barry, have I ever told you about my parents?” she asked abruptly. Barry blinked in startlement at the unexpected address.

 

“No, I don’t think you have?” he answered with a frown.

 

“My family is something of an anomaly in asari culture,” Caitlin continued, keeping her eyes on her work as she spoke in a deliberate attempt at nonchalance. “See, I actually have two fathers; both hanar. It’s...frowned upon, among asari, to take more than one bondmate at a time. It’s an old prejudice, from before asari encountered other species, when having multiple fathers was thought to increase the risk of certain genetic defects. That’s been disproven, but the prejudice still remains in a lot of places. My parents didn’t care, though. They loved each other, and to them that was worth more than what anyone thought of their relationship. That was the most important thing they ever taught me.” She finally looked up and smiled at both of them. “It’s just something you might want to think about, when Iris wakes up.” With that she left.

 

Barry and Lenod watched her go, Barry’s jaw slack and Lenod’s mandibles flared wide.

 

“Well, she’s certainly not subtle,” Lenod deadpanned.

 

“But she’s got a point,” Barry said, turning his ernest eyes on Lenod. “It’s been killing me knowing that when Iris wakes up she’s going to have to make a painful decision. But what if she didn’t?”

 

Lenod blinked at him. He had a feeling that he knew exactly what Barry was getting at, and the prospect was more intriguing than he would have thought he’d find it.

 

“I’m listening.”

 

“I’m not saying it has to be like with Caitlin’s parents,” Barry continued, “but really, is there any reason we can’t make this work? We both love Iris, she loves us and we get along pretty well. So what do you think?”

 

“I think,” Lenod answered slowly, “that there are a lot of logistics to this plan that you haven’t considered.” Lenod may not be hugely familiar with human body language, but he recognised disappointment when he saw it. “But we’re gonna need Iris awake before we can try to figure all that out.”

 

Barry perked up. “So that’s a maybe?”

 

“It’s a yes with conditions pending, so pretty much.”

 

Barry grinned happily at him, and Lenod couldn’t help but wonder just what he’s signed up for. He didn’t think he would have been as open to the idea of sharing Iris if he hadn’t already been sharing her heart with Barry. And this option at least gave him a higher chance of getting to keep her. But it also meant making Barry a part of his life. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Barry, that was the problem; he was starting to like Barry a little too much. The effervescent human was clawing his way under Lenod’s carapace just like Iris had. But Barry was human and male, and under her suit Iris wasn’t hugely dissimilar from a human female. Lenod knew that not everyone was like him and Iris; finding things they liked in all races and genders. There was a good chance Lenod could go into this trying to keep everyone happy only to make himself miserable.

 

But ultimately, that didn’t matter. As long as Iris was happy...and Barry was happy, Lenod would endure.

 

A few hours later, Barry and Lenod sat once more in Lenod’s quarters, preparing to practice melding. Barry was much more confident this time, making himself comfortable opposite Lenod and holding out his hand almost eagerly. Lenod suppressed a smirk at his enthusiasm, and let Barry pull him into the meld.

 

 _Excitement._ _Anxiety. Hope. Curiosity. Love._

 

_Iris._

 

_Lenod._

 

Lenod probably shouldn't have been surprised that Barry was thinking about him. In a very short period of time, Lenod had become an integral factor in Barry’s life, but Lenod was still not expecting to immediately find himself on Barry's mind. It made him feel oddly self-conscious. Reassurance wrapped around him, almost nuzzling his senses and Lenod couldn't help his confusion. Despite the fact that they had done this three times now, Leonard only now felt exposed and vulnerable, all because he could sense that Barry was thinking about him. Barry pulled him towards a memory. It was from the third day that they had sat by Iris’s bedside. Lenod was laughing at something Barry had said, his eyes closed and his mandibles flicked into a turian grin. Everything about him looked inviting, open and friendly, and abruptly Lenod realised that this was how Barry saw him. And beneath it all was that warm, effervescent feeling that had been there the first time they melded, filling up all the parts of him he hadn’t known were empty.

 

The memory shifted into that very afternoon. His memory self was speaking, cautiously agreeing to let Barry into his life if that was what Iris wanted. It was strange to hear his own voice through human ears; his subharmonics were barely discernible, just a slight vibrato under his words that betrayed none of the nuance that Lenod knew had been there. But to memory-Barry the sound was soothing, and his agreement cause for a swell of excitement and hope and that bubbling warmth that Barry seemed unable to control.

 

It felt dangerously close to affection.

 

That realisation was more than Lenod could handle. Just knowing that Barry was thinking about him had made him self-conscious, the threat of there being some deeper feeling to it was far more than Lenod was comfortable dealing with while metaphorically stripped bare. Inside their heads, there was no retreat, nowhere to hide, and while not proud of it, Lenod knew he needed that illusion of safety, the ability to withdraw, to remain calm when feelings were involved. So he panicked and broke the meld without warning.

 

“Ah!” Barry exclaimed, clutching his head.

 

“I…” Lenod wanted to apologise, wanted to explain, but he found himself frozen. His hand hovered between them, wanting to comfort, but also not wanting to risk being pulled back into that realm where he was so exposed. Barry peeked up from under his fingers, waiting for the explanation that wouldn’t come.

 

“Why?” he asked finally. “Why did you do that?”

 

“I…” Lenod tried again. He wondered if Barry even knew how he felt, if he was aware of just how much he’d been showing Lenod. He doubted it, as inexperienced as Barry was with melding and he doubted he would have been so eager to practice with Lenod if he knew what he was risking exposing. “...I needed out.”

 

Barry’s already unhappy face fell further. “Did I do something wrong?”

 

“No,” Lenod assured him, very aware he did not sound convincing at all. “No, you didn’t do anything, I just…” he trailed off again, still at a loss.

 

He was saved by both of their omni-tools chirping insistently. Both had recieved the same simple message, and the two shared a look of mirrored disbelief and relief. Iris was awake. They both raced back onto the Starflash and to the medbay, going through the cleansuit procedure faster than would have been thought possible. They waited impatiently for the inner door to open as the antechamber went through it’s decontamination procedure.

 

“You should go in first.”

 

Lenod looked sharply at Barry, startled by the command.

 

“She’s waited almost two years for you. You should go in first.”

 

“I don’t want to freak her out.” Perhaps the days he’d spent keeping vigil with Barry had made him more attuned to human body language, because Lenod didn’t need a meld to know that Barry was terrified right now. Beneath the cleansuit’s visor, Lenod could see small mass effect fields sparking up and running along Barry’s skin before dissipating, likely without him even being aware of them.

 

“You won’t.” Lenod reached across the space between them, bridging the distance he’d pushed there when he’d broken the meld. With the suits on, there was no chance of an accidental meld, and it felt more meaningful somehow for Lenod to choose to reach out, to let Barry know that he saw his vulnerabilities and offered comfort. He took Barry’s hand and squeezed it, the feel of five fingers wrapping around his talons now familiar and comfortable. “You’re gonna make her year.”

 

Barry looked at him for a long moment, those big, green so bright and intense that Lenod felt like Barry see into him as easily as if they were melding. The flickering mass effect fields died away.

 

“We go in together,” Barry decided firmly. Lenod nodded. Neither let go of the other’s hand.

 

The door opened. Wally and Caitlin were already inside, but Lenod was barely aware of them. All he could see was Iris’s face beneath the glass of the medpod, smiling at the sight of him. A tight band he hadn’t noticed around his chest loosened and he could finally breathe again. She was awake. She was alive.

 

She was yelling.

 

“BARRY ALLEN IF YOU FAKED YOUR DEATH, KEELAH I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF, YOU BOSH’TET!!” rang out through the pod’s communication speakers, distorted slightly due to her volume.

 

“He didn’t! He didn’t!” Wally assured her quickly.

 

“Stay calm, try not to strain yourself!” Caitlin ordered at the same time.

 

“Keelah, how are you alive?” Iris demanded, and Lenod could see tears beginning to spill from her eyes as Barry slowly approached the pod. Lenod wanted to let go, to shrink into the background while these two who clearly loved each other reunited, but Barry still gripped his hand tightly.

 

“It’s a long story,” Barry answered, his voice hoarse with emotion, “but I was in a coma for a long time. We’ve been trying to find you since I woke up, but, well, you found us. Or, Lenod did.”

 

Iris’s eyes moved back to Lenod and he could see the moment realisation and guilt crashed over her.

 

“Hey, Trouble,” he greeted her, his subharmonics so shaky that even Barry must have been able to hear it. He couldn’t resist reaching out his free hand and placing it against the glass, a move she automatically matched on the other side. “You scared us for a minute there. I know what you’re thinking, and you can stop. You just focus on getting better and then we can figure this out. Together.”

 

He turned to look at Barry at the last word for confirmation. Barry nodded, his eyes bright with tears, and pressed his other hand against the glass for Iris to mimic. Incredulous hope blossomed on Iris’s face, and it was strange to be able to read her emotions so easily, separated only by the pod’s glass and not the hazy veil of her envirosuit. Her hands were bare beneath the glass, pressed beneath their gloved hands, and yet it was still somehow more intimate and powerful without her ever-present suit. Or perhaps it was the added element of Barry’s hand in his, warm against his palm even through the suits.

 

“Together.”

**Author's Note:**

> Quarian Translations:  
> Keelah - 'By the homeworld'  
> Bosh'tet - equivalent to 'bastard' or 'son of a bitch'
> 
> Ship names:  
> Nar - 'born of', ie Iris was born aboard the Central  
> Vas - 'crew of', ie Iris lives aboard and is a crew member of the Rogue.


End file.
